BOY MOM DAY

Fifteen years ago today I became a boy mom.  I had been a girl mom for 5 years, and if you are a mom of both you might understand just what that meant to my family.  A home of pink and yellow and light teal added bold blues and vibrant reds.  A home of baby dolls and strollers added toy guns and army men.  And more importantly, a home of Fisher Price Doll House Families added Thomas the Tank Engines and Legos.  Oh my word the Legos - who knew?

So he came and he brought adventure.  He had frustrations rather than tears.  He showed us sling shots and super heroes, and he played with everyone.  He was the dad in every baby doll scenario and the husband for every dream wedding.  He was a pastor, a lawyer, bad guy or good.  He was Pa for the Little House stories, and the Lone Ranger on a broom stick horse.




 He introduced us to scouting and merit badges; we learned how much more boys eat and how much less they pack.  He is a wonderful younger brother, but I think he is an even better older one.  For the two girls and one boy who came later, he is an incredible hero.  For them he is Captain America and Thor all roles up into one.  For hours playing Legos and letting them tear up Legos; for the days of dressing up with everyone and pretending scouts, for the forts and ball games, for slumber parties with giggly younger siblings - he is my hero as well.

Today he is taller than I, stronger than I, and certainly has more muscles than I. But when he sits in our school room, and I try to teach him English and Math and History and Science and the Word, I see he is merely a boy.  The world looks scary to me for him.  The depravity seems to be coming out like fire ants when I kick a mound.  I want to hear him at the top of the steps playing Legos; I want to watch him hiking in the woods with his little sisters and brothers.  I don't want him to go out and slay the giants.  And yet, that is my purpose - to train him, to give him a home as a refuge, but not a hiding place.  For our God has chosen us to live in "such a time as this."

The little boy I rocked and nursed and carried in a backpack is growing quickly into a man.

He will always be my baby though.

Last week we walked down the street, and he held my hand.  I will treasure that memory always. So today, as he stands on the precipice of manhood; I will hug him and savor that his younger siblings give him Legos in hopes that he would play with them again.  I will pray that he will always "call upon the Lord who is worthy to be praised and will be saved from his enemies." Psalm 18.

Happy 15th!

Restaurants and Homes

What would happen if you showed up to eat at a wonderful restaurant with your family, and found that you were all going to eat at different places?  "Mom, you can go eat in the kitchen with the Chef, just stand at the counter and visit.  Dad you can sit right over here, we have a place where you can keep on working on that big sale while eating.  

Kids we have 3 different rooms for you!  Your favorite game is on in room one, room two has internet access and movies are showing in room three.  I am sure you expect better when your family eats out; why is eating at home so different?

I think The Table Matters.

THE FAMILY MEAL TABLE

The Family Meal Table.  Since my husband and I have been married, we have enjoyed a simple thing almost everyday, three times a day - we eat together.  Over the years we have added 8 people who also eat with us.  Over our life together we have extended our table to many families including 8 children who lived with us for a week while their mother healed from a life threatening event.  Our largest number coming in at a family of 15!  We add on two or three extra tables, turn corners in our house and feast together.  Over the last few months, I have begun to become more aware that this small thing, while fundamental to a society, is now an anomaly.

Anthony Daniels a doctor in Birmingham, England, recently spoke for Hillsdale College.  He made this observance, "These homes (the poor and families of prisoners he worked with) had no means of cooking a meal, or any evidence of a meal ever having been cooked beyond the use of a microwave. [...]  Many homes do not even have a dining table.  Needless to say, this pattern is concentrated in the lower reaches of society where so elementary but fundamental a means of socialization is now unknown."  (Imprimis, Hillsdale College).

My husband and I were also recently at the local county jail to have our fingerprints made for foster care.  While there we met a lovely young lady who had recently graduated from college.  She was being fingerprinted for her job in the headstart program.  We asked her what she would be doing, and she listed some basic tasks that in the past a mother would have performed.  The most interesting thing, however, was that she would be sitting down to eat a meal with the children everyday.  She was responsible for teaching these kids a foundational part of a society.  She was doing what parents should be doing.  But these parents don't know how, and even our government has begun to see that this is a problem that needs healing.

My husband pointed out more importantly that all the church loves to talk of communion and feasting with the Lord, but we are missing a crucial part of the equation - the knowledge of why sitting at a meal would be a thing to be desired.  If you must have a Bible in someone's language, you must make sure you are speaking his language.  How silly to think we can tell someone how wonderful the Lord's Supper is or how the Lord spreads a banqueting table for us when that someone may not not have ever eaten a joyous meal at a table.

Let us realize that in our homes we have a beautiful opportunity to live the gospel already in our schedule.  Three times a day we can feast with our spouses, children, neighbors, friends, and strangers.  Let us come to the Family Meal Table and feast on the Gospel.  Let us find this place of healing.